How To Balance Being A Mom You’re Proud Of And Keep A Clean House At The Same Time
/
Photo by The Creative Exchange on Unsplash
Let’s face it, life is busy. How can we fit it all in? Work, kids, husband, friends, home? Feels like I’m good at focusing on one thing and then end up neglecting another.
As a mom, do you ever struggle with balancing being a mom and the never-ending chores?
You want to spend time with your kids, but those dishes in the sink are calling your name, and that laundry needs to be folded and put away, and the floor needs to be swept and the bathrooms need…and on and on it goes.
You know, my grandmother’s house was so clean you had to take your shoes off, but you couldn’t take your socks off because the oil on your feet would hurt the carpet!! What?! No, I’m serious! She even polished her sink faucets! 😳
How do you think this made us kids feel? Did we feel like our grandmother thought we were valuable and precious in her life? Honestly, I thought my grandmother liked the carpet more than me. I never felt good enough and NEVER felt like I could do anything right around her.
How about you? Are you stressed out trying to create the “perfect” home? Is your house so immaculate that your kids feel like they can’t measure up?
I know in our hearts we would never want to make our kids feel like our homes were more important. We’re moms–We love our kids!
You’ve heard it said that “actions speak louder than words.” What are your actions telling your kids?
So, how do we make sure we are communicating to our kids how much we love and care for them? Bonus– you’ll still manage to get the never-ending housework done
Delegate more of the housework to your kids
Wait, what?! How can delegating housework to my kids communicate I care more about them than the house?
First of all, you’re showing them you trust them! And, you can’t have a close relationship without trust.
Can they do it as good as us? Most likely not.
But, as a mom, our job isn’t to have a perfect house. Our job is to train our children how to be successful adults.
Our kids can’t learn unless they have a safe place where they have the opportunity to fail and not be raked over the coals for it.
Failure is a part of the learning process.
We don’t always learn something when we succeed. But, we can learn volumes through our failures. Especially if you help walk your kids lovingly through the process of learning from their mistakes.
How many of you wished you’d learned that one year ago? I know I do! It would have saved me from a fear of failure complex that prevented me for years from stepping out into my calling.
Watch what you're saying to your kids
What do you say to your kids most often?
Do they hear “no” more than “yes”?
Do they hear “Be quiet” more than “tell me about your day sweetheart”?
Maybe when you were young, you didn’t get to hear how much your mom loved you. Maybe, you only were told negative things about yourself.
Is that what you want for your kids?
This is our chance to change history for your kids!
What are your kids going to remember you say to them the most?
What we say to our kids will stay with them forever. Unfortunately for some of us, it just might be the stuff therapy is made of. 😩
This Mother’s day, my 5-year-old daughter brought home a card she made at pre-school. They were questions that the teacher asked her about me and the teacher wrote down what she said. (I’ve included a picture for your enjoyment.).
They asked how old I was (God bless her, she said 20!), my favorite food (chicken nuggets - I guess she didn’t know how to spell foie gras. Just kidding, that’s not my most favorite food, but I do enjoy it now and again. 😉), and other questions whose answers brought a smile to my face.
Mother's Day 2018
But, the question that stopped me dead in my tracks what this:
My mom always says, _______________________ .
What my little girl answered melted my heart and made me cry!
She said, “My mom always says, I love you.”
I love you! That’s what my little girl remembers that I say to her most!
I tell you what, it was also a sobering moment. What if that’s not what she heard me say most of the time? It made me even more conscious of what I say to my kids.
How about you? What do you want your kids to remember most about you?
At the end of the day, I want my kids to know they are loved–they are loved by God and they are loved by me, unconditionally.
We could have the cleanest house, so clean one could eat off the floor, but will our kids grow up and think the floor being clean is more important to us than they are?
My husband was pulling Frozen stickers off our countertop that our creative 5-year-old daughter had strategically placed there. In his frustration, he said, “It never ends.” I told him, “it will end.”
It does end…and it will end all too soon. What memories do you want your kids to have about growing up with you?
You get to choose. Now, go tell your kids you love them (and delegate some housework–but not in the same instance). You’ll never regret saying it and showing it too much!