How to Train Your Mind to Be Brave | Think Better. Live Braver. series part 1 | Ep 377
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Shift From This and That to Both/And Thinking
Have you ever wondered why some women seem to move through challenges with peace?
Meanwhile, you’re over here replaying every decision a hundred times in your head, trying to figure out what to fix or how to make it all work.
I’ve been that woman. I trusted God with the outcome, but I still felt like I had to plan, push, and make it happen. I’d watch other entrepreneurs who looked calm and confident and think, What do they know that I don’t?
Here’s what I found out—they don’t have more faith, talent, or confidence. They just think differently.
That revelation became the heartbeat of my new series, Think Better. Live Braver. Because if we want to live courageous, purpose-filled lives, it doesn’t start with doing more. It starts with thinking better.
The Trap of This and That Thinking
Our brains love control. They want certainty, clarity, and comfort.
That’s why we slip into this and that thinking.
It’s neat.
It’s safe.
It makes us feel like we’ve got things under control.
This and that thinking sounds like this:
“I’m this confident AND I’m that scared.”
“I’m this trusting God AND I’m that taking action.”
“I’m this spiritual AND I’m that strategic.”
This and that thinking boxes us in and keeps us stuck.
But faith doesn’t live outside of the tension. It lives right in the middle of it.
The Way of Both/And
When we shift from this and that to both/and, everything changes.
We learn to hold two truths at the same time without losing peace in the middle of the tension between the two.
You can be scared AND courageous at the same time.
You can wait on God’s timing AND still prepare in the meantime.
You can rest AND still be productive.
That’s what spiritual maturity looks like. It’s learning to live in the tension of both/and. Because “This is the way.”
Jesus Modeled It First
When I think of both/and living, I think of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane.
Matthew 26:38–39 tells us that He said,
“My soul is deeply grieved, to the point of death... My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; yet not as I will, but as You will.”
Jesus carried divine authority and human emotion in the same moment.
He felt the weight of fear and anguish, yet He still chose obedience.
Dang, I can set a diet and run from it as soon as I see a Halloween Twizzler looking lonely.
That’s what both/and looks like—feeling afraid AND moving forward anyway.
When we acknowledge what we feel without letting it lead, our brain actually starts to calm down. Neuroscientists call it naming it to tame it.
When you say, “I feel anxious, and I know God is with me,” you’re not denying reality—you’re letting truth lead your emotion.
That’s courage in action.
Three Ways to Practice Both/And Thinking
1️⃣ Acknowledge Both Without Arguing With Either
You don’t have to fight your feelings into submission. Courage isn’t pretending you’re not afraid; it’s saying, “I feel afraid, and I can still obey.”
Jesus modeled this perfectly. He felt anguish and still fulfilled His purpose.
When you name both what you feel and what’s true, your faith matures right there in the tension.
2️⃣ Reframe Your Words With Both/And Language
Proverbs 18:21 reminds us,
“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.”
Your words create the atmosphere you live in.
When you speak in this and that terms, you limit what God can do.
When you start using both/and language, you open your mouth to speak courage instead of fear.
Try this:
“I’m learning as I go, and I’m growing stronger.”
“I can trust God and take action.”
“I can feel nervous and still show up.”
What you say out loud trains your brain to believe what’s possible.
3️⃣ Get Comfortable Being Uncomfortable
This one’s my favorite and my least favorite at the same time.
Courage is never comfortable—it’s commitment in motion.
Hebrews 12:2 says Jesus,
“for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame.”
He didn’t love the pain, but He loved the purpose…which was us by the way.
That’s how we move too–focus on the purpose.
Every time you act with courage in discomfort, your brain rewires itself. It starts associating bravery with growth instead of fear. So yes, you can feel the butterflies and still send the proposal, still post the video, still lead the meeting.
Courageous women don’t wait for confidence, we build it through obedience.
🛠️ Courageous Action
This week, I want you to practice both/and thinking in three areas:
Mind: Name both what you feel and what’s true.
“I feel uncertain, and I know God is faithful.”Mouth: Reframe your words with both/and language.
“I can trust God and take action.”Movement: Do one uncomfortable thing that moves you toward your calling.
Brave thinking doesn’t ignore fear, we invite faith to sit beside us while you move forward anyway.
So the next time fear shows up, take a deep breath and remember: you don’t have to choose between faith or action. You can hold both.
Because courageous women? We think better—and we live braver.
Show Notes
🗓 Summary
If overthinking, procrastination, or shiny-object syndrome have been keeping you stuck, this episode will help you move again. We’re kicking off Think Better. Live Braver., and I’m showing you how to shift from either/or thinking to both/and thinking—so you can trust God and take action, feel fear and still move forward with courage and clarity.
✨ Who This Is For
Faith-driven women entrepreneurs who feel stuck overanalyzing every move, waiting to feel “ready,” or torn between trusting God and taking action.
✨ Takeaways
Overthinking and procrastination aren’t a strategy problem—they’re a thinking problem.
Courageous women don’t choose between faith or action—they learn to hold both.
Jesus modeled how to feel emotion and still move forward in obedience.
Both/and thinking activates courage and creativity in your brain.
Your words shape your world—what you say strengthens what you believe.
Courage isn’t comfortable; it’s commitment in motion.
💬 Sound Bites
“Brave women don’t have more—they think differently.”
“Either/or shrinks you. Both/and grows you.”
“Faith isn’t the absence of butterflies—it’s obedience even when they’re going crazy.”
“Courage isn’t comfort—it’s commitment.”
🛠️ Courageous Action
This week, practice both/and thinking in your mind, mouth, and movement.
Mind: Name both what you feel and what’s true.
Mouth: Speak both/and statements out loud.
Movement: Do one uncomfortable action that moves the needle.
⏱ Chapters
00:00 – Why some women move through challenges with peace
02:00 – The trap of either/or thinking
07:45 – Jesus’ example in Gethsemane
12:00 – How both/and thinking activates courage in your brain
18:00 – Three Courage Practices: Mind, Mouth, Movement
27:00 – Courageous Action + Free Beat Procrastination Cheat Sheet
🎉 Who Am I
Hey friend, I’m Heather—your Courageous Coach. I help Christian women entrepreneurs go from stuck, not-enough, and fearful to focused, confident, and courageously growing themselves and their businesses. I’m also the author of Hello Courageous and founder of The Courageous Club.
💡 Let’s Stay Connected
📖 Hello Courageous Book: hellocourageous.com
🛒 *Get on Amazon: https://amzn.to/4oSc855
🆓 Beat Procrastination Cheat Sheet • hellocourageous.com/beatit
🆓 Overcome Fear by Friday Challenge • hellocourageous.com/fear
🌐 Website: heatherbunch.com
📧 Email: hello@heatherbunch.com
📸 Instagram: @heatherlbunch
*Affiliate link: if you purchase using this link, I’ll make a small commission.